The Wallflower is Really a Swan: When Venus and Saturn Meet

Navigating some of the most challenging aspects in astrology

Karina Lafayette – April 2021

Bebe Rexha in her music video “Not 20 Anymore”. The singer has Venus square Saturn in her birth chart.

Ever felt like you need to have your entire life in order before being with someone? Are you somebody who is committed to their career and can’t stand the idea of having a partner who’s clingy and dependent on you? Did you often get bullied growing up, only to have a glow up years later (emotional glow ups included)? Are accomplishments the spice of life for you?

Then you just might have a case of Saturn aspecting Venus.

In your birth chart, look for the following aspects to see if you qualify. And no, there isn’t any compensation for this. The universe drew up your chart, not me.

Aspects to look for:

  • Venus in Capricorn
  • Venus in the tenth house
  • Venus square Saturn
  • Venus conjunct Saturn
  • Venus opposite Saturn
  • Venus trine/sextile Saturn

Folks who have Saturn blessing- and yes, in a strange way it is a blessing- their Venus, tend to have delayed reactions and experiences when it comes to love. If this isn’t the case, they’re either going to marry young, only to divorce later once they’ve grown into their swan era, or they usually attract suitors who are either older or appear older. Many people with Venus-Saturn work in modeling, acting, film, television, and dance, all because Saturn gives them discipline, a sharp mind, and preserves the physical beauty of Venus well into old age. But not all of it is superficial, it also gives one a diplomatic edge to any business deals and makes for a money-savvy individual.

*For the rest of the article, gender won’t be focused on here because I don’t agree with the old-fashioned idea that women act like their Venus while men pursue their Venus, since:

a) Not everyone is straight.

b) If you’ve ever been with a man, you know damn well his Venus sign will show when he loves you. If it doesn’t show, he doesn’t love you.

Venus in Capricorn — Love me later

When Harry Met Sally (1989)

This placement experiences love with either a huge dose of early maturity, or might avoid it altogether till you have your career and other areas of life in check. It’s not that you aren’t emotional or lovey-dovey (remember, the whole chart matters), it’s just that certain feelings act like a distraction toward you. Venus in Capricorn folks don’t bother with frilly, over-the-top gestures of romance, unless Neptune is involved and depending on the house it’s in. This sign is very dedicated and committed and will rarely stray. Tradition can be important, and you may be a tad uncomfortable with people who like to show off. There can be a phase of casual sex, but that’s mostly in your younger years when the empire hasn’t been built yet.

In dating, you prefer to let a love interest make the first move,but will manage to find subtle ways to manipulate them into doing so, by direct eye contact, showing off your accomplishments and money, and dressing to the nines. You’re not one to try and be friends first like Aquarius, but it is important you gather intel on your special person to figure out what makes them tick. On the outside, you’ll keep mum about feelings but translate them well into the perfect gifts as that is, of course, one of your main love languages. Love needs to be precious and practical, and the partner should have their own life to keep busy with anytime you are. Be careful with control issues and the need to act like a parental figure, since this could put a damper on any sexual feelings and manifest into an Oedipus/Electra Complex.

Venus in the Tenth House — Let’s be a power couple

Bonnie and Clyde (1967)

Ahh, the tenth house, probably one of the most loved and despised areas of a natal chart. This house is where we go to shine our gifts onto the world. It’s related to career, how we work with others in our field, and shows the possibility of fame or some type of important recognition. The tenth is also the house of business, since it’s the natural home to Capricorn. Because this is the highest area of our chart, any planets here take longest to show in someone’s personality. You have to fake it till you make it, for this planet to really bear fruit. Otherwise, it can feel unreachable.

So of course, having Venus in the tenth means you’ll either meet your partner at work, share the same field as them, or the two of you will become the business version of Bonnie and Clyde. If this isn’t the case and the idea of working with a lover feels uncomfortable, it can show someone who’s very supportive, or even a sugar baby/sugar daddy/momma type. You’ll want the person who’s on stage sharing the glory, someone who has a good reputation of their own, who dresses well and stands their ground. Folks with Venus in the tenth house are usually very attractive; though don’t be fooled, they are still very much the boss. A career in the arts and entertainment, cosmetics, fashion, or with a mainly female clientele, are also highlighted. It’s easy to attract admirers and any conflict will resolve itself as you are a natural peacekeeper.

Venus square Saturn — Love me, why would you?

Breakfast at Tiffany’s (1961)

You often question what people like about you and even wonder if their feelings are an act. People can shower you with compliments, take pictures, share your art with the whole community, and you still don’t feel good enough. Similar to Holly Golightly from Breakfast at Tiffany’s, you want love but feel disconnected on how to go about accepting it, and make up for it by claiming you can do everything solo and don’t need anyone. Older women inadvertently get jealous and try to dim your shine for no good reason. Younger women see you as competition even when you’re minding your own. Your mother or older women in your family could’ve even told you, “don’t wear this, don’t flirt too much” as an attempt to “protect” your light from the world. That line from Cyndi Lauper’s “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun” comes to mind as I write this, and it’s a song I relate to painfully.

I may be bias since my natal Venus in Taurus is square Saturn, but this is perhaps one of the most challenging aspect Venus will ever have. A square in a natal chart is essentially when two planets are 90 degrees from each other, which creates friction. Both planets are in the same modality (Cardinal, Fixed, Mutable) but different elements, which means they function in a similar way, but speak a different language. In my case, I have an earthy Venus squaring Saturn in Aquarius, and in all honesty, the way to make this aspect work is by keeping both of the planets happy, sort of like learning to please your future in-laws to get the chance to spend forever with a beloved. It’s also crucial to look at the houses both planets are in to see which areas of life are at odds. So if you have Venus in the first square Saturn in the fourth, your home responsibilities can get in the way of self-expression. Put in the work (Saturn) but remember that you’re already perfection. Otherwise Venus square Saturn will feel like literal sandpaper rubbing on your sweet, delicate heart.

You attract partners who are either too serious and money-focused, or partners who are irresponsible and in need of a caretaker. There’ll even come a time where you say “f#ck it” to relationships and just focus solely on your career (Saturn), to avoid any hurt in love (Venus). In a way, you’re really committed to your career and can even see a love interest as a threat to success. Another way this aspect can manifest is through eating disorders or strict dieting. Even whe n already healthy, you’ll be on the constant lookout for flaws that don’t exist. The good news, squares and Saturn aspects in general get easier with age. There’s potential to find a lover that stands the test of time, even though when the two of you meet, there will be some challenges in order to come together. As you get older you realize the universe gave you this body as a vehicle to experience everything, romance goes from stale to roses, and you slowly let go of the need to be flawless. Singer Bebe Rexha (pictured at the top of this article) has Venus in Libra square Saturn in Capricorn, and uses her fame to promote self-love. She’s always been open about overcoming eating disorders and her struggle with mental health. Because squares create resistance, many people with Venus square Saturn seem ageless, and often become role models for those around them.

I’m not twenty anymore/Don’t try to make me insecure/Cause I’m aging like wine/I get better with time/Yes I do/And, oh, I’m not twenty anymore/The lines on my face they weren’t there before/But I’m wiser, I’m stronger/From all of the life I’ve been through 🎶

Venus conjunct Saturn — Business is Pleasure

Secretary (2002)

When two planets are conjunct (within orb of 0⁰-8⁰), this fuses the energies to basically create one entity. Venus conjunct Saturn therefore, can have many similarities to Venus in Capricorn. If you have this placement, you’re outlook on finances and love were rather serious from a young age. Your parents may have had a large age gap, or their personalities contradicted each other. Affection wasn’t common at home, as discipline and “tough love” would take precedence. Anytime you tried to reach out, there was a sense of people around having better things to do. The way you dress and present yourself is very curated yet simple, never seeking too much attention but somehow getting it anyway. In early years, you may have struggled with money or were forced into poverty, which taught you the hard way of how to save. There’s also a tendency of dreaming of large purchases, only to have that dream brought down to reality. Down the line, there could be an inheritance from a grandparent or older relative that will make life comfortable.

In love, marriage or commitment will most probably happen later. Similar to previous placements, there can be an age difference with your partner. In the bedroom, you could enjoy BDSM and be turned on by getting disciplined. You’ll also feel uncomfortable with flirting and dating and only grow into that energy once the dating pool has had their fair share of experiences. This is another great aspect to become an entrepreneur, but you may spend the first years of your career with so much self-doubt, that you’ll have to be sure of your work before letting others see it.

Venus opposite Saturn — Love me, love me not

Amelie (2001)

Similar to the square, Venus opposite Saturn shows a push-pull between romantic/creative matters and obligations. You may bounce between getting totally invested in a relationship to the point of forgetting about everything else, and focusing only on structure and serious stuff. This area of life will feel like a tug-of-war as you go through extremes on the regular. You’ll have times where you’re completely broke, only to find yourself excelling at making money. One minute you could be flirting, gaining strides with a potential love interest, only to be drawn back to the cold realities of work. The key here is to put together a schedule, where you have specific hours devoted to obligations, while still making time for things that bring you joy. If finding this balance is too challenging for you, set apps on your phone with reminders, paste lists of your daily routine around the house, and share these management concerns with friends and people you trust.

Oppositions are not all that impossible to deal with, as long as you do everything consciously. For example, anytime you find yourself too critical about emotions, stop those thoughts in their tracks and ask where they came from. Changes are those ideas were projected from a father or authority figure growing up. And remember, the key isn’t to have perfect balance all the time, it’s to blend the Saturn and Venus energies to your advantage. If for example, you have one planet in the fourth house and the other in the tenth house, then this calls for finding time for both family and work. Avoid the urge to always be at the office, and turn off any emails and phonecalls as soon as you come home. You’ll feel guilty at first, but trust me, it’s better to make room for extra downtime, then have the feeling of regret later because you missed out on genuine connection by putting all your time in one place.

Venus trine/sextile Saturn — Love in a Material World

Crazy Stupid Love (2011)

Last but not least, trines and sextiles in astrology are usually favorable, because it shows two planets both in the same element or agreeable that cooperate together in a smooth, energetic flow. For example, it’s a trine if there is Venus in Taurus and Saturn in Capricorn (with of course both planets being within orb), whereas it’s a sextile if Venus is in Taurus while Saturn is in Pisces. The only catch is that there’s a tendency to get complacent since things come so naturally. Trines and sextiles are similar, except a sextile may be less obvious to the chart holder. Think of for example, high school sweethearts like in Crazy, Stupid, Love, who’ve been together for so long, they stop making an effort. Because the relationship came about so easily, it’s natural to want to take each other for granted, and this is where harsher Saturn is actually a good thing. Either way, both these aspects make you successful with money and gives a natural confidence from young. If you need a loan, people have no issue with providing and you’ll be happy to return the favor. In career, you work easily with older colleagues or anyone in a position of authority. Where love is concerned, you still possess the typical shy demeanor as anyone else with Venus-Saturn, but your way of going about it will come across as charming and coy.

In other words, to make this aspect work to your advantage, you still need to put in some effort and show gratitude, since as the planet of karma, Saturn still expects something tangible. Or you could, you know, be fine with finding that out during your Return. 😉

All in all, Venus-Saturn doesn’t have to make anyone doomed. These aspects require tenderness and sensitivity and with a little time, living in this body and loving a certain way begins to feel more natural. At some point you come to realize there isn’t anything wrong with you, the swan has been there the whole time. It’s almost like a lesson in law of attraction since at its best, Saturn is like a magician that gives so much faith in hard work, eventually the effort we put in has no choice but to manifest into something beautiful. There’s never going to be perfect timing, either. Whether you meet them at the height of your career or just as it’s about to take off. So despite how many disappointments or heartbreaks, keep believing that better is on the way, and before you know it, the love of your life and career of your life will appear right before your eyes.

To check out my books, social media and more, scroll to the menu, where you can also book a reading. Also be sure to watch my new short documentary series on the Saturn Return!

This article was originally published on Medium.

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